There’s Nomageddon Like Snowmaggedon

There's nomageddon like snowmageddon
Like nomageddon I know
Not a thing about it is appealing

There's nomageddon like snowmaggedon

Everything in traffic will go slow
Nowhere could you get that trapped feeling
When you are shov'ling that extra snow

There's no people like snow people
Their tops they will all blow
Even with a virus that you caught from mold

You may be stranded inside and cold
Thinking to yourself, this sure gets old
Let's get over this snow

Your neighbor, the asshole, so selfish, that jerk
He's secretly a happy guy because
Your neighbor, the asshole, so selfish, that jerk

Got a riding blower but for no cause
Fills your driveway up with snowy gobs
Goodbye to common sense and decorum oh my

There's nomageddon like snowmaggedon
And I tell you it's so
Skiing on the train tracks is so thrilling

Standing out in front and watching the fights
Smiling as you watch the spaces filling
With folding chairs, and slashings by night

There's no people like snow people
They sneer when the winds blow
Potholes come from nowhere with an awful crack

And when you lose it, there's no way back
Where can you get french toast for your snack attack??
Let's get over this snow

There's nomageddon like snowmageddon
Like nomageddon I know
You get nuts before the snow has started

In this drama you are just a pawn
Top of that, snow season has just started
You're broken hearted but you go on

There's no people like snow people
They flip you off and go
Massaholic if you don't move in your car

Last night it snowed and there you are
Freezing and trudging just to get to the bar
Let's get over this snow

Sincere apologies to Irving Berlin, Ethel Merman, and you, dear reader.

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